Mind throw-up

remember growing up, there was that kid in your class that could do that really cool thing? remember how much you thought he was the most awesome person because of it and you really wished that you could too? you may have attempted for a while, but then you realized, he just has natural talent. you then continued to admire him and move on towards something else. this is how i feel about blogging.

i struggle with the idea that i am supposed to have something intelligent to say to a world of people (let's be honest, it's just our media class that looks at these, but it proves a point). there needs to be a balance of wisdom, fun, thought provoking ideas, and quick wittiness. this needs to be something that just comes and yet is developed while writing the blog post. am i trying to impress someone? am i just doing it because it's an assignment from class? am i fulfilling a need to be heard, even if there is only one or two who actually read this? does this sort my thoughts out on a subject i never know i needed to sort? i feel that all are valid questions.

i feel, in my case, blogging is more of a mind throw-up. i do enjoy a good conversation with someone when there is a deeply thought idea and then questions and viewpoints shared by all. this is especially beneficial when all feel comfortable sharing their true ideas. but the concept of a blog is more, "here are my thoughts, hopefully they are worthy of your mind's contemplation."

i have a few blogs that i frequent. both are very close friends of mine and neither have too much direction, but both are deeply moving. as i read them, i want to change or evoke some change in someone else in order to continue the snowball effect.

but how does one get to that point? you have the time old answer of  "practice makes perfect," which i do believe in, but there are those that are natural writers. they grab your heart, get your attention, cause you to laugh, wonder, meditate on the everyday things like peanut butter or the complex things such as death.

blogs are a gift and a curse. i feel like there are many out there who could write books and change lives through actual published work, and yet...what is a blog? a published (in the sense that it is public material) and easily accessible work of writing. people can search the web and find your blog, read it, be changed by it, and you would never know. or they may leave a comment but they aren't writers themselves, so how do they express their appreciation for the effect you had on their lives?

or was their an effect? i would hope so...but at least i know that blogging does allow my mind to sort through the thoughts that run rampant through my head. but what are your thoughts? what conversation might we have in a cafe while sipping some hot drink to fight off the cold?