i recently heard this song, Just Give Me a Reason, by pink and nate ruess (lead singer of fun) and instantly liked it because of the catchy beat. I have my suspicions that the nate ruess wrote the music, and possibly the lyrics, but for sure the music because it has that pull that many of fun's songs have for me. "some nights," "carry on," and even "we are young" each have that pull, but upon reading the lyrics to those songs, they are somewhat depressing. their overall messages are of not believing in love, moving on from those who have hurt you, and being young-making stupid (abusive) mistakes. each of these similar to my earlier post I "think" I want to marry you.
i was even more happy when the lyrics are about a relationship, and the common mis-haps that occur and the couple fixes them and becomes stronger for it. i would say that the roles in the song are typical, but they can be switched between the man and woman. here you have love at first site, both willing to do anything for the other. compliments and bending over backwards to help the other succeed. then, as time passes, doubts enter the minds of one or both people. as the doubts creep further and further, there is still that deep love for the one you have sacrificed for that holds you to the relationship. the love that has "been written in the scars on [their] hearts." the doubts are still lurking and cause one to burst in front of the other. the other is confused somewhat by the outbreak and trys to calm the fears of the first by explaining his side of the story. he explains that he has noticed a slight distance between them, but they both need to hold on, there just needs to be a small reason, a simple thing...love. when anger, doubt, sadness, frustration, etc. come along, "just give me a reason, just a little bit's enough," a single reason of how i love you, and we can mend our bent love to be whole again.
we each cope differently in our relationships with people. hopefully, we feed our excessive energy into a good habit such as running, writing, or manual labor. sometimes we do something with the intention in our mind as saving the other person from harm, such as not saying anything after a fight, to make sure you don't say anything you will regret. unfortunately your intentions can be read wrong by the other and seen as an attack, or a closing off. an innocent joke to lighten the mood could be seen as not taking a situation seriously. we can be blinded by our own fears and worries, enough to not look at the perspective of the one we love.
but when we do, it is just like nate sings at the culmination of the song, "no nothing is as bad as it seems," and pink sings, "we'll come clean." we will explain both of our sides, and then walk away from the situation together realizing that "we are not broken, just bent and we can learn to love again. it's in the stars, it's been written in the scars on our hearts, that we're not broken just bent, and we can learn to love again."
my question to each of you is this: what does it mean to you when they sing "it's been written in the scars of our hearts?" i have my own thougts, but am interested in yours.
Sunday, January 27, 2013
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
I "think" I want to marry you...
Marriage has been an ideal concept in the worlds history. Whether it be women planning their weddings, their flowers, their dresses. Men planning on providing for their wife and children, buying a house, repairing the car. These are a few things that come along with marriage.
This is not even mentioning the "L" word....yes, Love. Unfortunetly, in our society, is becoming more and more acceptable, and even expected, for marriages to fail. In a recent lecture, we were informed that most people create the vows that they give thier spouse when married. Many of these no longer even say "in sickness and in health....till death do us part," but now say "till love do us part." This is assuming that love is its own entity and can come magically into our lives and at its own desire can leave. This false love is what is guiding our sense of marriage. It is propegated by Disney, "chick flicks," action movies, and especially by music.
How often do you hear the phrase, "I don't really like the words, but the beat gets me going!" when refering to music? I am an avid runner, and I'll admit that I say that sentence frequently. The beat of the music does affect my pace and when running a race, this can be the difference between a personal record and a "fun run."
But let's be honest, whether it is conscious, or subconscious (which could be debated at a separate time whether there we actually have a subconscious), our minds understand the message the lyrics are portraying.
I came to the conclusion this evening that I don't like the words to Bruno Mars' "Marry You" lyrics. It is all about this false love. Not only is it contriving this false love, but its disparaging marriage as some whimsickle "dumb [thing] to do."
The saddest part is when Bruno sings, "If we wake up and you / Wanna break up, that's cool / No, I won't blame you / It was fun, girl"
What happened to being married for eternity, or at least "Till death do us part?" Is that too "ideal" now? No longer a modern concept? Our society has also moved into a much more selfish idea of, "Well, what will this do for me?"
A main contributing force to this way of thinking is the media that we consume.
This is not even mentioning the "L" word....yes, Love. Unfortunetly, in our society, is becoming more and more acceptable, and even expected, for marriages to fail. In a recent lecture, we were informed that most people create the vows that they give thier spouse when married. Many of these no longer even say "in sickness and in health....till death do us part," but now say "till love do us part." This is assuming that love is its own entity and can come magically into our lives and at its own desire can leave. This false love is what is guiding our sense of marriage. It is propegated by Disney, "chick flicks," action movies, and especially by music.
How often do you hear the phrase, "I don't really like the words, but the beat gets me going!" when refering to music? I am an avid runner, and I'll admit that I say that sentence frequently. The beat of the music does affect my pace and when running a race, this can be the difference between a personal record and a "fun run."
But let's be honest, whether it is conscious, or subconscious (which could be debated at a separate time whether there we actually have a subconscious), our minds understand the message the lyrics are portraying.
I came to the conclusion this evening that I don't like the words to Bruno Mars' "Marry You" lyrics. It is all about this false love. Not only is it contriving this false love, but its disparaging marriage as some whimsickle "dumb [thing] to do."
The saddest part is when Bruno sings, "If we wake up and you / Wanna break up, that's cool / No, I won't blame you / It was fun, girl"
What happened to being married for eternity, or at least "Till death do us part?" Is that too "ideal" now? No longer a modern concept? Our society has also moved into a much more selfish idea of, "Well, what will this do for me?"
A main contributing force to this way of thinking is the media that we consume.
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Texting
why is it that our lives are run by the media? i guess i shouldn't say "our"...that may be too over encompassing, but honestly, who doesn't use their phone everyday? especially in relation to emerging adults? i have a roommate that went over a month and a half without a cell phone (because he didn't have any way to charge it) and he felt so detached.
how often do you have your phone in your pocket, on vibrate, and "feel" a text/vibration and find out that if was a phantom text? how often do you check your phone, just hoping that someone has texted you, regardless of whether it is just a "hi" or a detailed 3-text-long message about how awesome your weekend was? this might be brought on by being severely bored in school, or waiting for something to happen, or, what i find most common, when i am in an awkward situation and don't want to acknowledge that i am uncomfortable and kind of want someone to talk to me, but i feel that would make it even more awkward.
i will admit, i definitely have those days. then there are those overwhelming days where the phone doesn't stop vibrating because of texts and phone calls, and this is happening while in class.
i have had several experiences where i haven't had a phone for several months, like my roommate (but for different reasons) and actually have loved it. a release from technology. take me to the woods with no cell service, a backpack, some friends, no technology, and i will be happy.
how often do you have your phone in your pocket, on vibrate, and "feel" a text/vibration and find out that if was a phantom text? how often do you check your phone, just hoping that someone has texted you, regardless of whether it is just a "hi" or a detailed 3-text-long message about how awesome your weekend was? this might be brought on by being severely bored in school, or waiting for something to happen, or, what i find most common, when i am in an awkward situation and don't want to acknowledge that i am uncomfortable and kind of want someone to talk to me, but i feel that would make it even more awkward.
i will admit, i definitely have those days. then there are those overwhelming days where the phone doesn't stop vibrating because of texts and phone calls, and this is happening while in class.
i have had several experiences where i haven't had a phone for several months, like my roommate (but for different reasons) and actually have loved it. a release from technology. take me to the woods with no cell service, a backpack, some friends, no technology, and i will be happy.
Fatherhood. By Any Means. Necessary.
There will always be several things that I think of when the word "Father" is said to me. First and foremost, my own father will come to mind and how he was constantly participating in PTA meetings, coming to piano recitals and track meets. One of my favorite memories is going on a father and sons campout, sitting around the tent, eating special candy that he always has, eating delicious pioneer stew (made by my wonderful cook of a mother) and then, all the sudden, he pulls out his laptop (I must sidenote and say that this was when decent laptops were new, as well as DVDs) and he pulled out U571, a submarine movie, and that is one of the moments when I knew that my dad was the coolest dad ever. Another fond memory that I have of him is Stadium of Fire, Beach Boys addition. Seeing him so happy and singing his guts out and just spending quality time with my pop.
The second thing I think about is my own desire to be a father. Having been around tons of neices and nephews, as well as many other kids, I look forward to having my own little daughter or son.
My thoughts about being a father have changed slightly, or maybe I should say that they have solidified after having watched this video on youtube.
Fatherhood. By Any Means. Necessary.
Although I don't agree with the assumption in the beginning of the couple not being married, I do appreciate the bravery and courage that it takes to not only take on the responsibility of your child but to then place him or her above yourself. That, that is fatherhood. "For the men who see their babies as blessings and not mistakes and their job is father to your daughter is the world's greatest occupation"
"This is for men who go further, who strive to be better." Inevitably, there will be times as a father where I will fail. Despite my best efforts, whether it is being linient and letting him watch a movie that probably is a little too violent, or for not giving enough time to listening to her tell me about her day. But as stated, men must strive to be better. I cannot stop trying, for my own sake, but mainly for their sake.
"Who love gently from their hugs and even harder from their hearts."
As a dad, there will be plenty of things that you would rather not do, but because your child loves it, you gladly do it to spend time with them. There are also many aspects of fatherhood that are not spoke of. For example, when he says, "For all the dads who know all the words to every Justin Beiber and Miley Cyrus Song," is that what society thinks of when they hear the word father? Or do they think of a man with a pot belly, working on the car or reading a newspaper? What of the fathers that are playing dolls with their little girls, or listening to music with their sons (music that they think is wild and outrageous)? Are they good fathers? How do we change the stereotype?
"For all the fathers who raise their daughters by feeding their minds with books and knowledge of the history, not letting them be misguided by what they see on TV."
After watching this clip (and I have watched it quite a few times) I get chills. This is what fatherhood really is. Putting children above your own wants and desires. Being their for them and doing what's best for them. Too few tv shows, movies, books, and other types of media show this type of parenting from the male end of the spectrum. By no means do I mean to take away the sanctity and wonderful nurturing qualities of women and mothers. I only think that society needs to see more men stepping up and fighting for their children. No more of these bumbling idiots that are portrayed in Modern Family, Simpsons, Home Improvement, or even the Bill Cosby show. These shows are funny, but give kids and fathers a warped sense of what being a father means.
We may feel that we are inadequate to do our job as men, husbands, and fathers, but it is possible. There are things we can work on. For starters, take a glance at a talk given by an Apostle of Jesus Christ, entitled: Brethren, We Have Work to Do.
There are more good quality men than I think we realize, but each feel somewhat alone. But deep down, in their moderately solitary role, they have the follow creed:
"This is God's work. A man's work. And I don't care how you get it done. This is Fatherhood. By any means. Necessary."
The second thing I think about is my own desire to be a father. Having been around tons of neices and nephews, as well as many other kids, I look forward to having my own little daughter or son.
My thoughts about being a father have changed slightly, or maybe I should say that they have solidified after having watched this video on youtube.
Fatherhood. By Any Means. Necessary.
Although I don't agree with the assumption in the beginning of the couple not being married, I do appreciate the bravery and courage that it takes to not only take on the responsibility of your child but to then place him or her above yourself. That, that is fatherhood. "For the men who see their babies as blessings and not mistakes and their job is father to your daughter is the world's greatest occupation"
"This is for men who go further, who strive to be better." Inevitably, there will be times as a father where I will fail. Despite my best efforts, whether it is being linient and letting him watch a movie that probably is a little too violent, or for not giving enough time to listening to her tell me about her day. But as stated, men must strive to be better. I cannot stop trying, for my own sake, but mainly for their sake.
"Who love gently from their hugs and even harder from their hearts."
As a dad, there will be plenty of things that you would rather not do, but because your child loves it, you gladly do it to spend time with them. There are also many aspects of fatherhood that are not spoke of. For example, when he says, "For all the dads who know all the words to every Justin Beiber and Miley Cyrus Song," is that what society thinks of when they hear the word father? Or do they think of a man with a pot belly, working on the car or reading a newspaper? What of the fathers that are playing dolls with their little girls, or listening to music with their sons (music that they think is wild and outrageous)? Are they good fathers? How do we change the stereotype?
"For all the fathers who raise their daughters by feeding their minds with books and knowledge of the history, not letting them be misguided by what they see on TV."
After watching this clip (and I have watched it quite a few times) I get chills. This is what fatherhood really is. Putting children above your own wants and desires. Being their for them and doing what's best for them. Too few tv shows, movies, books, and other types of media show this type of parenting from the male end of the spectrum. By no means do I mean to take away the sanctity and wonderful nurturing qualities of women and mothers. I only think that society needs to see more men stepping up and fighting for their children. No more of these bumbling idiots that are portrayed in Modern Family, Simpsons, Home Improvement, or even the Bill Cosby show. These shows are funny, but give kids and fathers a warped sense of what being a father means.
We may feel that we are inadequate to do our job as men, husbands, and fathers, but it is possible. There are things we can work on. For starters, take a glance at a talk given by an Apostle of Jesus Christ, entitled: Brethren, We Have Work to Do.
There are more good quality men than I think we realize, but each feel somewhat alone. But deep down, in their moderately solitary role, they have the follow creed:
"This is God's work. A man's work. And I don't care how you get it done. This is Fatherhood. By any means. Necessary."
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Minding the Gap
most of you will be familiar with the phrase, "mind the gap." it refers to space in between the train car or subway car and the station floor. usually, as you get to your station, there is some catchy toon, then a voice that says something similar to, "now arriving to pickadilly station which intersects with the red, brown, and green lines. when stepping off the train, please mind the gap."
i feel that most people are smart enough to "mind the gap" without a reminder, but of course there are always those that are concentrating on their phone, or ipod, or book, or deep thoughts (we all have those, i think) and step incorrectly. in reality, i don't blame them. i feel that most of us have our moments where we trip (figuratively or literally) or do something stupid. this even happens despite the womenly voice urging us to "mind the gap."
two things now. first, why are there no capitals in this (or any of the following blog posts to come)?! a wise friend of mine decided that they are a nuisance, and i am in agreement. second, what is this blog for? it is a clever way that a professor of mine has allowed us students to be creative and yet educational with our critique of the media we are exposed to. so, over the next few months and beyond, you will find my thoughts on media that come my way. plain and simple...maybe.
finally, why "mind the gap?" what does media have to do with the phrase "mind the gap?" let's be honest, i was trying to be clever. people are always trying to come up with hidden meanings or deep insights, well this is my attempt.
i feel that we are exposed to all sorts of media, whether it be tv, movies, music, video games, advertising, books, etc., and are not aware of how they are affecting us (aka the gap). the average teenager is exposed to 11.5 hours of media a day! i would imagine that it increases for college students and adults. with this overly saturated life of media, its a wonder how it all shapes our decisions and personality. i feel that we are too busy running around with our busy schedules and "important" due dates, that we fall straight into the gap that has so expertly and surreptitiously been put there by "the powers that be." i am not referring to God by any means, but to those that are in charge of mass media. and the gap is growing.
so, instead of being the monotonous voice that becons those around to "mind the gap," i will be attempting to expound upon the day to day media that many are exposed to and deliberately saying something along the lines of "do you see the gaping hole after the doors, that if you fall, your leg might break, or you might step wrong and drop that delicious donut you just purchased at the last station? or spill the coffee on your new shirt that you bought for that interview today?"
but don't get me wrong, this most definitely won't be a nagging and pessimistic view of media (at least for the most part). the two posts that i already have in mind are of uplifting and fun media.
i feel that most people are smart enough to "mind the gap" without a reminder, but of course there are always those that are concentrating on their phone, or ipod, or book, or deep thoughts (we all have those, i think) and step incorrectly. in reality, i don't blame them. i feel that most of us have our moments where we trip (figuratively or literally) or do something stupid. this even happens despite the womenly voice urging us to "mind the gap."
two things now. first, why are there no capitals in this (or any of the following blog posts to come)?! a wise friend of mine decided that they are a nuisance, and i am in agreement. second, what is this blog for? it is a clever way that a professor of mine has allowed us students to be creative and yet educational with our critique of the media we are exposed to. so, over the next few months and beyond, you will find my thoughts on media that come my way. plain and simple...maybe.
finally, why "mind the gap?" what does media have to do with the phrase "mind the gap?" let's be honest, i was trying to be clever. people are always trying to come up with hidden meanings or deep insights, well this is my attempt.
i feel that we are exposed to all sorts of media, whether it be tv, movies, music, video games, advertising, books, etc., and are not aware of how they are affecting us (aka the gap). the average teenager is exposed to 11.5 hours of media a day! i would imagine that it increases for college students and adults. with this overly saturated life of media, its a wonder how it all shapes our decisions and personality. i feel that we are too busy running around with our busy schedules and "important" due dates, that we fall straight into the gap that has so expertly and surreptitiously been put there by "the powers that be." i am not referring to God by any means, but to those that are in charge of mass media. and the gap is growing.
so, instead of being the monotonous voice that becons those around to "mind the gap," i will be attempting to expound upon the day to day media that many are exposed to and deliberately saying something along the lines of "do you see the gaping hole after the doors, that if you fall, your leg might break, or you might step wrong and drop that delicious donut you just purchased at the last station? or spill the coffee on your new shirt that you bought for that interview today?"
but don't get me wrong, this most definitely won't be a nagging and pessimistic view of media (at least for the most part). the two posts that i already have in mind are of uplifting and fun media.
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